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DeSantis Is Already Toast And The Horserace Press Is Unhappy

DeSantis Is Already Toast And The Horserace Press Is Unhappy

DeSantis is a dick and no one likes him.

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The Opinionated Ogre
May 02, 2023
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DeSantis Is Already Toast And The Horserace Press Is Unhappy
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Nearly-man Ron DeSantis, via Getty images

by Justin Rosario

Farewell Meatball Ron, we hardly knew ye. As of this writing, it is 555 days until the 2024 presidential election. The Republican primaries have yet to even begin and Ron DeSantis’ campaign to be Der Führer of America instead of just the Sunshine State appears to be sinking faster than the Florida coastline. 

Looks like we’re going to get Trump vs. Biden, Round Two. The horserace press is riddled with angst over the prospect. I, on the other hand, plan to soak up their suffering like a sponge, the rat bastards.

What happened to Ron?

Well, let’s not pretend Ron DeSantis was ever a leading contender. An outlier poll or two had him within single digits of Trump. A few even had him ahead! But the overwhelming majority of polls had Trump crushing DeSantis like an empty beer can at a Brett Kavanaugh frat party. So what happened?

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The Opinionated Ogre
Stay-at-Home ogre. Liberal. Cynical. Curses a lot.
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